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Message started by jencm on Mar 31st, 2010 at 12:50pm

Title: Egads....Scared and frustrated!!
Post by jencm on Mar 31st, 2010 at 12:50pm
Well, I cut about 3 inches off my nearly waist length back in January, hoping to alleviate the issues I was having with bad dryness, tangles, split ends upon split ends, all due to damage from the last time I dyed it a couple years ago before I started growing it out, and this just being the stuff that had yet to be trimmed totally off....but here I am nearly in April, all the issues back. Unless there's an obscene amount of Jojoba or other oil in my hair, it's getting so tangled just pulled back in a ponytail that it took me 30 minutes the other day to untangle the complete mess that it was.  :'( I've done everything I can find here and anywhere else and I think it's just time to do it....Be done with this once and for all. I think I'm going to get this 8 remaining inches of dyed, drier hair....cut off. I just really don't want it affecting the healthier, un-dyed hair I've got growing in....Plus, I know it doesn't look beautiful, and when I wash my hair, I can close my eyes and tell where this hair starts because it feels very literally like dry straw. It's just utterly frustrating, to have gone two years growing this out, trying to get trims, be kind to my hair....and bye bye length. *sigh* I'll go from being nearly back to waist length, to below my collarbone length. Blah. Oh well!
Plus, to top it all off....I'm not going to lie, besides being scared of just the general idea of losing that much length and how flustered I feel like I'm going to be (I don't want to do that thing where I regret cutting it off because maybe I could have gotten by another month or so without doing it) - I'm scared of hairdressers. I hate A) the utter JOY they get at cutting off long hair a lot of the time. =( And B) I hate when you tell them what you want done and then they try to tell you that your hair isn't damaged and just get some of this conditioner, blah blah blah. Lady....I think I spend more time with my hair and know exactly how dry, etc it is! =P
Just can be such a frustrating process....had to vent! I know people here will at least understand!! :)
My hubby loves my hair long, but on the other hand he thinks I totally overreact about getting it cut off because it'll grow back. He just doesn't "get" how long it takes and feels like when you're TRYING to grow it.

Title: Re: Egads....Scared and frustrated!!
Post by Angel on Mar 31st, 2010 at 4:01pm
Shhhhhh...there there, dear. Deep breaths.

Firstly, if you've read The Ultimate Guide To Growing Long Hair graciously provided on this site (hint hint), you're already familiar with the cardinal rule. I'm sorry, but if you want the rest of your hair to be healthy, you must cut off what's unhealthy. Call it a necessary evil.

Your husband might not understand how long it takes to grow back lost length, but I do. Years ago, I had to chop my waist length hair to 6 inches to remove a dye job that I hated. A decade later, I am still growing it back, but I don't regret the cut for one single minute.
    Traumatizing as it was to lose that much length at once, it ended up being a total rebirth for my hair. I got to start over from scratch, vowing to take the best care of it that time and funds would allow. It's so much healthier now, I can't tell you. As someone who's been there, I can assure you that the end result is totally worth it. If I can lose over 23" at one time, I think you can part with 8, yes?

Lastly, you don't have to go to a salon. Do you know someone who is going through/went through beauty school and could cut your hair for you? Do you have a friend or relative who's pretty handy with scissors? Or might there be a barber shop nearby? There are alternatives out there if you look for them.
    However, I should mention that not all stylists are scissor happy sadists eager to give you the layered, highlighted, side parted bob cliché. If they suggest any such thing, march yourself out of that salon and go elsewhere. You are in control here, not them.

Best of luck. ;)

Title: Re: Egads....Scared and frustrated!!
Post by jencm on Apr 1st, 2010 at 1:24am
Oh, I now you're totally right Angel. I know I have to cut it and it's just what must be done. And I know overall 8 inches isn't a lot compared to what some have done! I have a friend who had nearly knee length hair and she went through some health issues and ended up cutting it to her shoulders....so I know it could be worse. =/

I really have no one around I trust to cut it...haha. Sadly. And I know not all stylists are like that! :) I just seem to have had the bad luck of having to deal with a great many, and it's just left me worried anytime I go in anymore....kind of like going to the dentist. lol.

Title: Re: Egads....Scared and frustrated!!
Post by Trisha on Apr 1st, 2010 at 11:17am
I can't add anything to Angel's advice, which is spot on.  Remember, the sooner you get all of the damage cut off, the sooner you'll be on your way to healthy, long tresses.   8-) 

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