The Saturday that just past, I got 2.5 inches cut; because I had an immense amount of split ends. My ends look much better; however, I started "dusting" my hair and found over 50 splits ends. I almost feel like my hair will never reach my goal of at least 25 inches. Before my hair cut it was 14 inches now it’s about 11 something inches with layers. How can I ever get growth if I must keep on chopping it? My mother-in-law says that you don't have to cut your ends for growth, what do you guys think? Personally I hate the look of brittle dry ends, so I must get my hair trimmed every other month at least. I would much rather have short attractive and strong looking hair in comparison to a long brittle mess.
Just to give everyone a profile of my hair its 3b or c I think, moderately thick really soft, curly and wavy pattern, but more so wavy. I wash my hair about once to twice a week if I am wearing it curly, but if it is blow-dried straight, I can wait up to two or sometimes three weeks. I use conditioner to detangle, gel, and everything else. I also oil my hair about 3 or 4 times a week.

I thought that getting my ends trimmed frequently would be enough. The last chemical I put in my hair was about two summers ago (color). I have not relaxed my hair for many years, and the hair once relaxed hair is far-gone. Right now I only have a little color on the ends. I don't know what else I can do to avoid such an amount of split ends. I even decreased the amount of blow-drying I do. I try to limit myself to once or twice a week. The biggest dilemma is, I hate my curly hair, and it makes me feel like a little girl. And when I go for interviews, in my opinion I don't look very professional, so I must straighten it.
I am very thankful for your input. But I wonder if the amount of conditioning I do cause damage to my hair. I read somewhere that the proteins in conditioners can break the hair, if overly used. What do you think?

Could you suggest any hair regimens I could follow, to ensure the health of my hair. Thanks.

if i were you i would cut off all the hair damaged by both coloring and relaxing, when the hair grows back it will not be damaged so it will not split