I'm so sorry you are stressing over this.

I'm not a tax accountant, but just how is your dad reporting the money?  If he "gifted" it to you and it is under the annual limits for gifts, you do not have to claim it as income.  If it was a loan, you still would not have to report it as income.  If you were repaying the money, with interest, your father would need to report the interest as income.

Hi Debr

If it's any further help do you know if there are any accountants nearby who offer half an hour or so free initial consultations ?

If so why not consider booking a quick appointment with them and explain things ? Ideally if you can ("well, it is kinda personal" !) a woman who might just be that much more sympathetic !   They're all officially bound by the laws of their profession to keep such matters private, so it might at least be a start and take some of the worries off your mind ? It sounds as though it’s the caring, friendly professional shoulder as much as anything you need right now.

If nothing else hope this is of some encouragement ? Keep in touch....  

Cadie