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flat-iron your hair or relax it? (Read 4000 times)
Blondie35
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flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Mar 26th, 2008 at 10:34pm
 
Hi all,

I was just wondering if any of you would either flat-iron your hair to straighten it?  Or, would you relax it?  The reason I'm asking is because I was thinking about letting my hair go natural, and let my perm grow out until next August or fall, and I was just wondering which one you would do to keep your hair straight?  I'm also thinking about going blonde as well.  You see, I was thinking of going blonde either still relaxing my hair.  Or, going natural, and wearing the blonde look too but color specialists always tell me that it's not a good idea to use bleach over relaxed hair.  Because, it will weaken it, and it will cause a lot of breakage and damage.

Now, I have tried putting a bleach over my relaxed hair about 10 years ago, and no disasters happened to my hair like breakage or damage or anything.  It was in the best health it has ever been before I actually bleached it!!!   I mean, my relaxed and  bleached hair was still strong after both processes!!!  The product I used was Clairol Born Blonde.  Now, I've used the old Clairol Born Blonde over my relaxed and color-treated hair before, and I didn't have any breakage at all!!  I guess that my hair really loves Clairol!!  And Clairol really loves my hair!!!  I really haven't had any products with the bleaches that are out on the market these days!!!  I can also use Revlon's Frost&Glow Blonding Kit as well!!  I love using that brand!!!!  Because, it turns my hair white or platinum blonde like what I really want it to do, and after I use the Revlon Frost&Glow it still leaves my hair feeling and looking nice, soft, shiny, and healthy.  It never looked or felt weak or damaged.  When I both relax and bleach my hair I always believe in conditioning and moisturizing!!!!  That is very important.

I've always believed that even when I was just relaxing.  But when you are both relaxing, coloring, or bleaching you should always condition, condition, and condition, and since I do also bleach I use lots of reconstructing products on my tresses too, and they really work wonders!!!  I can remember I used a color removing product by Loreal a couple of times, and it really weakened my hair to the point of breakage and damage, and I went and put a relaxer in after I had gotten some new growth about a month afterwards, and as soon as I was putting the relaxer in, and as I was rinsing out the relaxer in the shower big globs of hair starting falling out.  I was losing all of my hair!!!  I said, Never no more!"  That was worse hair disaster of my life!!!  Then I was referred to this reconstructor conditioner by someone in a beauty shop, and she referred me to 2 reconstructors.  One is by Fantasia IC, and the other one is by Alphogea. Now, she did worn me that as I keep on using the product I will keep on losing the dead broken off hairs, and I will start to regrow in the new healthy hairs.  I was really upset about it but in the long run I was very reliefed that I wasn't completely bald.  But either Alphogea products and Fantasia products are really really excellent!!!  I love them both.  But Fantasia especially has really really worked my hair wonders in helping it to grow back faster and healthier!!!
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Sakina
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #1 - Mar 26th, 2008 at 11:47pm
 
I think we have a few girls here that relax their hair, but I don't think we have any that also color it other than maybe using henna.  I hope they'll jump in here to address your questions.
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Godyssey
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #2 - Mar 27th, 2008 at 3:11pm
 
I have a relaxer.  I had my hair done a few shades lighter many years ago, but I would never do that again. It isn't very healthy for the hair so it takes a lot of work keeping it conditioned to prevent breakage.  Also, the color and relaxer aren't one time deals because of the up keep.  So, each time you get your color and relaxer touched up, you're risking the chance of your hair becoming over processed.

Although, a lot of it also has to do with your hair type.  My hair type is 4a so that makes it pretty fragile to begin with.
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Sakina
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #3 - Mar 27th, 2008 at 4:55pm
 
Thanks for responding, La Diosa!
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Godyssey
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #4 - Mar 27th, 2008 at 6:56pm
 
Wink
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Blondie35
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #5 - Mar 30th, 2008 at 2:25pm
 
Sakina,

Yes, I know whatcha mean.  As long as I've been a member of this website I have read some of the other member's posts, and they do say that it is very unhealthy to both color and relax your hair at the same time but I've been doing so for many years, and I have learned that my hair texture is very good, and very strong.  So, it's not as fragile as La Diosa's.

Now mind you, if I relaxed my hair one week, and the next week color it, and then color it again that will really weaken it and make it fragile and prone to damage and breakage.  But other than that my hair is VERY strong!!!  Oh yes, I often read that the members here color their hair with henna.

La Diosa,

Oh yes, I know whatcha mean about that in between relaxing and coloring process, and they are both not a one time thing.  You have to keep both of them up, and everytime you do so that is putting your hair at risk for breakage or damage.  Well, my mother has been relaxing and coloring her hair for 20 or 30 years, and she has never gotten and damaged or broken off hair.  Her hair keeps on growing and growing and staying very healthy.  But she will never have hair as long as waist length or beyond.

She didn't inherit hair that long.  The longest her hair can ever grow is shoulder blade length or almost bra strap length.
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Godyssey
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #6 - Mar 31st, 2008 at 5:07pm
 
There's a chance that the reason your mothers hair hasn't grown longer than bra strap length is because of all of the chemical processes.  Sometimes when hair appears to be at terminal length there is a possibility that it's still growing, but the unhealthy ends are breaking off so no new length is gained.

I don't know what your current length is, or if you have goals to grow it super long, but if you do, you may want to reconsider any additional chemical processes.  I'm not trying to discourage you, it's your hair.  I just want to help you make an informed decision.  Sometimes you can't add chemicals and obtain long lengths too but again, a lot depends on your hair type.
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Blondie35
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #7 - Apr 1st, 2008 at 8:11pm
 
Yeah, that's what I was thinking too but with her hair type she needs a relaxer serously.....LOL  Her hair is very coarse, and thick.  The only way she can straighten it is either relaxing or the old-fashioned pressing it like the way black people used to do back in the day before relaxers ever came out.  I don't mind pressing my hair but it takes sooooooo much time, and plus it doesn't last as long as the chemical process does.  I honestly think that if my mom wants to grow her hair waist length it can get there if she spreads out her chemical processing more.  Like, one week do her relaxer, and I wouldn't color my hair or roots again unitl 3 or 4 months from the time I did my relaxer.

But I remember one day my mom and grandmother(her mother) was talking about how they have a cousin on my grandmother's side of the family that has a cousin from the "Virgin Island," and she used to have waist length hair, and my grandmother is 95 years old, and she remembers like it was yesterday that of how she used to comb my cousin's waist length hair but as years went by, and as they both got older her cousin chopped all of her waist length hair off, and that was either back in the 1950's or 1960's, and she hasn't had hair that long ever since then Sad  I think it's because her cousin started putting some many products on her hair to the point of it never growing back, and then my grandmother came out, and told my mom, "But your hair could never grow that long."

MY mom said that when she was a youngster in her teens on up to her late 20's she had always wished for waist length hair but she always knew that she couldn't grow it.  The only way that she can have it is investing in extensions or weaves.  I honestly think that my mom has been chemically treating her hair for at least 40 years.  I mean with the relaxers.  Now, with the coloring I'd say she's been coloring and relaxing her hair for 20 years.  I've tried explaining to her of the damage she could be doing to her hair but she doesn't think that her hair is  breaking off.  Now, it might not be but to be on the safe side I would avoid as much chemical as possible if I can.  The main chemical I'm concerned about avoiding is the relaxing.  I'd rather just deal with coloring it, and as far as straightening it I can do that with the flat-iron but I don't want to do that too often either.  Because, the hair could get damaged that way too.  I have decided now to spread out all chemical treatments, and that is instead of doing my relaxers every 6-8 weeks?!  I'll be doing them every 2-3 months.  The coloring I can do every 4-6 weeks or once a month.

But I can really understand why my mom feels that she need or want to color her hair.  It is because she's in her early 60's, and she doesn't want any of her gray hairs to show.  If I were her, if I want my hair to grow really long I would let part my gray roots show!!!!  I would let about an inch or two grow, and then I would color my roots only.  But I also think her problem is too is that she believes in recoloring her ends.  She thinks that her color fades out every 4-6 weeks.  It's partially true but when it comes to her haircolor which is black it is very hard for black to fade out!!!  I've known from experience.  Because, I used to color my hair black as well, and it took me a longgggggg time to get out of the black shade!!!!  I always believe when I am coloring my hair I only color the roots nothing else.  I do the coloring process just as I do my relaxing process.  Just re-touch the new growth or the virgin hair.

Well, my goal for growing my hair is superlong to close to the floor.  Not dragging the floor but something like Crystal Gayle's length.  But you're right when it comes it having to do relaxers and colorings depending on the person's hair type and texture.  My hair texture and type is also very thick like my mother's but not as thick.  Mine is more like on the wavy, curly, and thick side.  My hair is curly and wavy like a Hispanic or Mexican person's hair.  But every time I both relax or color my hair I deep condition it at all times.  After KI wash out the relaxer I use a very mild neutralizing shampoo, and I use an instant conditioner, a stablelizer conditioner, and then my cholestrol conditioning treatment.  I do it either with or without any heat.  Then means sometimes I sit under a hooded dryer for 20 or 30 minutes for really deep conditioning.  Then I blow-dry or wet roller-set as usual.  But with me doing all of this to my hair I use lots and lots of conditioners and moisturizers, and oils.

My hair used to be mid back length....I think it's the goal you're trying to reach but my hair hasn't been that long since 1984.  That was the year I got my first hair cut.  My hair used to be 2 inches above my waist.  If I would have continued to let it grow or left it alone I think I would have reached my goal by now.  I have friend that can grow floor length hair, and when it was that long she used to relax  and color it all of the time!!!  She's a natural light soft brown but she started coloring it a beautiful bright auburn red brown, and it was all of her hair!!!!  And every time I saw her and her beautiful floor length auburn red brown hair it appeared very healthy and shiny looking.   It looked so nice, soft, and shiny.  I'm sure her hair had to be relaxed.  Because, she also had very thick head of hair too, and with it being floor length I can't see her being natural.
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Blondie35
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Re: flat-iron your hair or relax it?
Reply #8 - Apr 1st, 2008 at 8:25pm
 
I also think at the time she was going to a special hairstylist that specialized in long hair.  The more I think abouit it something keeps on telling me that she was going to the famous hairstylist named, "George Micheal," and I think he has a salon in the state of Georgia.  I'm not sure but I've seen on his website that he helps people with very short hair or shoulder length hair grow their hair to super lengths.  I've seen a couple of ladies grow their hair by going to him to the floor!!!  Since I've seen his website, and have read his methods of how to grow long hair and take good care of it I have really learned a lot from him.

I love his methods of growing long hair!!!!  Especially when it comes to drying the hair.  He never uses blow-dryers!!!  He only wetsets the hair on rollers.  I think that is the healthiest way to go for drying and styling!!!!  Your hair comes out feeling and looking much smoother than it would if it was blow-dried or even air-dried.  But the only thing tha is very weird to me is that one day last year around this time I had called my girlfriend with the floor length hair, and she was busy.  So, she called me back, and we started to have a little conversation about what type of work she was doing, and then I brought up the subject about her hair.  I started commenting on how much I admire her floor length hair, and she came out and told me that she had never had floor length or hair that long in her whole entire life!!!  I was stunned!!!  I said to myself, "She's a lie."  I remember her very much so having hair that long when we were kids growing up!  She said that the longest her hair has been was shoulder length.  She also said that I remember her has having shoulder length hair.  I started to tell her, "No, that is not true."  I remember you having much longer hair.

And then she changed it and said, "The longest my hair has ever been growing up was down my back, and that was even waist length."  I said to myself again, "She is another lie."Once I remember her hair  being almost floor length, and then one day I noticed that she chopped it all off up to her waist.  I DEFINATELY remember that!!!!  She thinks that I'm stupid or a fool.  I know and remember exactly how long her hair used to be.  The weird thing popped into my head was,  "Why would she disown her hair like that???  Or, why is being upappreciative about her beautiful floor length hair???  I would be proud to show and tell people that I can grow floor length hair!!!  My honest opinion is, I don't think she likes and appreciates long hair.  She said in our last phone conversation that she is going to maintain her hair at shoulder length.  Not anything longer.  Now, that was a year ago in February.  She could have changed her mind and heart by then.

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