Can you tell us more about your hair?  How long is it now?  Is it straight, curly or wavy?  How thick is it? 

What kind of shampoo are you using?  Are you using any conditioner?  How often do you wash your hair?

If we know a bit more, we can hopefully help more.

As for the white gritty bits in your hair--I used to get those back when I used a LOT of hairspray/gel in my hair.  If you have acquired enough buildup, just shampooing might not remove it.  Mix some baking soda with shampoo in the palm of your hand and rub it in all over or apply it directly, whatever works--just get it onto your hair and then RINSE WELL.

If you are having trouble rinsing all the shampoo out of your hair, I would ask first how MUCH of it are you using?  I have heard that a dime-size is good for "regular" or shorter hair.  I have been using a quarter size for my long hair, and this produces LOTS of bubbles which I could see would be hard to rinse out for some people, especially those with thick hair. (Mine's not)

Do you have a shower?  I think rinsing hair under a shower head is WAAAAAAAY more efficient at rinsing, than pouring water over a sink or kneeling beside the bathtub.  The diffusion of the spray and also the greater force of it REALLLY helps.

I would also recommend doing a vinegar rinse to try to remove any build up of product on your hair.  The vinegar rinse would be done after your initial rinse of the the shampoo.

The amount of shampoo could also be an issue - many people use much more than is necessary.  If you feel smaller amounts would be too difficult to work through your hair, try putting a bit of shampoo in a squeeze bottle, add water, shake a bit, then apply that to your hair. 

I usually recommend using warm water to wash your hair - it helps soften and dissolve the gunk.  A cool or cold rinse is fine and some recommend it to close the cuticle of the hair.  I typically use cool water for my final rinse.

I find having a shower attachment helps a lot.  

I've stopped washing my hair upside down, so I had to find a better way to rinse shampoo out.  After rinsing as much as I can from the top, I then put my hand under my hair facing up.  I let the water flow through my hair, filling my hand.  You can also feel the water poofing up your hair.  Then, I press my hand toward my head, which swishes the water through, on the undersides of my hair.  I repeat this until my hair feels like the shampoo is rinsed out.  

I think it can also be done upside down - just cup your hand to catch the water.  I think it will make sense if you try it.

Good luck to you,

Cynde

   I'm back again and i'd just like to say a big thanks to everyone that helped me.

I've tried using the vinegar rinse and it worked.

I'm also washing my hair different, i put a tiny bit of shampoo in a bottle with some water then pour in on my head, and i wash my hair in warm water instead of cold.

My hair has never looked better, i went out today without wearing my baseball cap, the first time in 4 years.

THANKYOU TO EVERYBODY

That's great news Suzy! These hair divas are the best.