Back in black. 

Both flights were successful, obviously. Thank you all sooo much for your encouragement!

The morning flight to WA was easy enough...rough through SoCal, but pretty smooth from central CA to Seattle. The winds were blowing with us, and we actually ended up reaching Seattle earlier than expected. 
    The return flight was another story, however. Not only were we delayed for an hour while they fixed the wings (with everyone sitting on the plane), but the brakes burned up just before take-off - egad! You could literally smell them burning from inside the cabin.    The winds were rough and the flight was shaky...and I never realized that planes were so loud! Anyway, I'm never flying again...if I can help it. 

It was kinda cool looking out the window and seeing towns, fields, snow, trees, mountains, bridges, lakes and everything else in such a small scale. Almost like looking at a very miniature model.

Washington was not the way I remembered it...it was actually sunny a lot of the time, and I didn't get to eat a single blackberry.    But it was good to be back just the same. To see the trees...and my mountain...and my family.

On Friday afternoon, my grandfather took my immediate family to the funeral home for a viewing. Oh man, did that mess me up.    My sister too. We both broke down in tears at the sight of it...I can barely bring myself to write about it. I'm not sure that words could ever do justice to the experience.
    I will say that what we saw in that coffin was not our beloved grandmother. Just her shell. Just what that God-foresaken disease had left behind for the earth to reclaim.
    Her trademark smile and spark of life were gone, and I realized that day just how much a person's soul accounts for what they are as a person. And I thank God that her soul is forever free from pain and suffering.

The service on Saturday was lovely. Flowers of all different types and colours were everywhere.
    My family rode in stretch limo's to and from the services...I had never been in a limo before.
    My father and his band had recorded a few songs to be played while people were taking their seats inside the chapel. A video of pictures from throughout my grandmother's life was set to Bette Middler's version of "Wind Beneath My Wings" and played during the chapel service. I think that's when the tears started for me. They didn't stop until the day was half over...and I still have much grieving to do. 
    At the end of the service, they opened the casket for the family to pass by and say their final goodbyes. But I stayed in the private family section of the chapel, part of a floral arrangement blocking my view of what lay inside the casket. I didn't need to see that again. The first time messed me up more than enough. That's not how I want to remember her. 
    After my grandfather put a necklace that she had often worn on her, they closed the casket, and that was when I stood up to leave with everyone else. I ran my hand along the top of her coffin as I left the chapel. In our limo, we followed her white hearse to the gravesite, where I kissed a red rose and laid it on top of her coffin. Beautiful ceremony...but nothing could ever be good enough for her.

After that, the limo's took us to my aunt's house for a reception. This was not the typical sombre post-funeral reception, either...it was more like an Irish wake. Food and family everywhere. It was great...just amazing to see everyone in the same place. Even my surrogate parents from KS were there. All of my younger cousins are bigger than me now...most of them are taller than my father!    What a beautiful reunion.

Sunday, we had planned to get out and do something with my grandfather...but people just kept coming over and we ended up doing exactly what we'd done for the past 2 days - just sitting and talking! I don't think that was what my grandfather wanted.    Ah well. There's always next time.

Speaking of him, he's taking everything extremely well. At least on the outside. My family is quite worried about him. They think it's a front. But I wonder if in fact he's just very strong, well-adjusted and relieved. A co-worker of mine said that he was probably prepared for my grandmother's death...and she's probably right. In any case, I usually handle things in a similar fashion...and I wonder if he is where that ability comes from.

So what happened to my hair all of this time? That is for the next entry to explain...

Yay, you survived the flight(s)!!  
From reading about your grandmother's viewing and funeral, I am now more convinced than ever that (when I die) I do NOT want anything to do with an open casket, viewing, sad funeral service, etc.  I like the idea of a party of sorts, to celebrate the person's life (not mourning their death).  

*hugs*

*A hug for you and a prayer for your grandmother*

If you ever come to WA, you're welcome to come pick blackberries on the highway with me.

Wow...nearly a fortnight has passed since my last entry. Between losing Windows and my dear grandmother's passing, I'm afraid that I've missed much here.    So I'd just like to say:

Curlgirl64: Right indeed. I think that taking your grandmother out is a great idea. I sure wish I could have just hugged mine one last time.  

Anais: Blackberries are the fruit of the gods...although the deep forest ones are better. The soil by most any roadway is known to contain lead and probably many other things that could affect the fruit.  
   (((((((hugzzz)))))))) and thank you for the prayer - I'm sure she appreciates it.  

BB: I favour a cremation service over open caskets any day. Fortunately, that's something I only had to deal with once (and believe me, that was more than enough!). As aforementioned, I purposefully did not look when the casket was opened during the service.
   As for yourself, I do hope that you get to walking and biking again soon. Here's wishing you a fast & complete recovery.  

Trisha: I agree...although when someone passes away, mourning is inevitable. At best, we can but mourn and celebrate simultaneously.

Quote:

Either that or shaking her head and muttering, "God, she's even crazier than I thought!" Er...I would prefer the former, of course.  

As I told my boyfriend the other day, the idea of my grandmother visiting me once in awhile used to terrify me...but now I'm more or less OK with it. I just need to remember that it's her beautiful spirit that will be visiting...not the body. *shudder*

The night before last, I pictured her as she was...alive with her signature smile and sparkle, radiant light glowing all around her. With this image in my mind, I fell asleep smiling.
   Granted, I woke up several hours later and vomited...twice...but that was because of the bad soup I'd had for dinner before that. Oy.  

In other health news, I've been more careful about what I've been eating lately. Today I allowed myself some coffee and chocolate, and am not proud of it. Man, I sound like a ninny.  

I have also begun a new strength-training routine of sorts. Just to reclaim the muscle mass that atrophied under the influence of a past prescription.  
   This month I have devoted to my arms. I have to break it down into different zones because if I tried to do everything at once, I'd lose focus and interest, like countless times before.
   But right now is a good time to do this because it has actually taken this long for my body to respond to the new medication, which doesn't affect it so adversely.

As to my hair, I am still on Pantene Restoratives: Breakage Defense for S & C. Still liking it, although I'll admit that the fragrances of Herbal Essences still tempt me. Oy. Thank goodness that shampoo doesn't get jealous!  
   Only one leave-in: Pantene Light Spray Conditioner. It works OK by itself, although it does contain oil, which I'm not particularly fond of. I prefer to keep oiling to an absolute minimum: on the very ends of my hair only, as my skin reacts furiously to oil.

Speaking of which, I have been trying to use up my extra virgin olive oil, but it is so heavy, even when mixed with water, that I think I shall retire the rest of the bottle to the kitchen.
   I don't have all kinds of extra cash to spend on jojoba or anything like that, so baby oil will just have to do for now. It's been working well so far anyway.

Hoping to get a new copy of Windows soon so I can drop by here more often and actually reply to some of these posts. No idea how long it's been since I even checked my e-mail. Egad.
   
Well, that's all for now. Or at least all I can squeeze into one post for the moment. Peace.

Quote:


OOO!  OOO OOO! *waving hand in the air*
I have the better part of a bottle left (what size is that--4 oz?  6?  I don't know) that I would LOVE to send you.  I quit using jojoba a few months ago because my hair didn't like it.  But, frugal person that I am (you're not the only one, BB!), I can't bring myself to throw it away.  Would you take it off my hands, pretty please?  If you PM your name/address I'd be deliriously happy to mail it to you!!   

Haven't bought any new hair products in awhile. I consider this an exercise in restraint. Forcing myself to just use what I have until it's all gone.
    My boyfriend is helping with that, too. He's using the remnants of my Herbal Essences because he normally uses Fruit Fusions anyway. His hair is exactly what Herbal Essences makes of it. It has that verrry soft, silky, but hard at the same time feel. But the shampoo totally dries out his scalp & gives him bad dandruff. The conditioner also burns the back of his neck the same way it does with me. So there's nothing wrong with my skin after all. I guess Herbal Essences just does that! 

When we went out (yeah, you read that right...WE WENT OUT!!!) to dinner last night, he actually received a hair compliment and then some! Granted, this came from my sister who works at the restaurant that we went to. But she came over and told him that his hair looks so good now that it's growing out. She also told him that he & I are a beautiful couple. She was just full of compliments last night.  *sigh* That girl is still my ray of sunshine.

Anywho, as for me, I'm still using Pantene Restoratives, but am gradually tiring of it. I guess the thing is...my fine hair needs a conditioning shampoo in order to combat the tangles. An opaque crème-type shampoo, rather than the transparent gel forms. The gels never fail to let my hair tangle, and where there are tangles, there is inevitable breakage...that's exactly what caused so much damage to my hair before.

When I was younger, I used Suave S & C, brushed my hair when it was wet, left my hair down all day and just ripped right through the tangles with a brush. I washed it in hot/warm water and sometimes used a blowfryer...sometimes styling products.    Needless to say, I had a lot of split ends during that time. Dyeing it black and bright red on occasion didn't help things, either.

I wonder what faux pas I'm doing now that I'll look back on in the future and cringe. "Why oh why did I ever give into the fragrances of Herbal Essences? And did I seriously use a wall-mounted showerhead? What was I thinking?!" 

Anyway...I need to clarify in a few days, so that means getting some vinegar on my next grocery run. Hopefully that will be today or tomorrow.
    The only question is.....do I keep using Restoratives after that, or do I go back to one of the basic lines? And if I go back, do I pawn the rest of my Restoratives bottles off on my boyfriend? *chuckle* Poor guy. He gets all of my reject stuff... that's not to say that I have poor taste.

So yeah, it's Easter Sunday and what am I doing? NOTHING! With the exception of making up some mac & cheese for lunch. That's right...no church, no family gatherings, no honey baked hams    just me and my eeevil heathen gypsy self. I might stop by my parents' place if I go into East County today to shop. Other than that, just bummin'.... I'm still wearing my pj's and last night's makeup    and it's past noon! Bleagh. I hate being disgusted with myself, even if it is nothing new. 

Anywho, time to fix that & start getting stuff done. Hopefully my hair won't tangle too much in the process.
Peace!

I understand--just thought I'd offer!   

Alright. I give. I accept that I am a hopeless flake & may never settle on one S & C. But maybe that's OK.
 
Today I clarified again....this time with Herbal Essences Clarifying shampoo, Clean-Rinsing conditioner and a vinegar rinse in a 1L Fiji water bottle.
    I used the Herbal Essences leave-in conditioner, too, before detangling with my RS #45. After the length started to dry, I sprayed the ends with my baby oil/water mix.
    My hair dried much faster than it does when I use Pantene. *raises eyebrow* Hmmmm....

What's more...when it was totally dry, I took a BBB that I'd stashed in my purse and ran it through my hair one small section at a time, from the bottom up. Then I ran my Conair Velvet purse brush through it....man, did it feel satiny! 
    I put it up in a looped ponytail before too long, though, just to keep myself from playing with it too much. 

Tonight, when I took my hair out of the loop, I was shocked to discover that it wasn't the least bit tangled!
    I'm going to use the Rainforest Flowers Replenishing S & C that I bought after work today & see if the same thing happens. *crosses fingers* This could be good!

Anyway, I must work early tomorrow, so the sooner I get to bed, the better. 'Night!