Very sorry for your loss, dearheart.  Prayers are with you.  *hugs*   

It's amazing how I walk away with so much more than just hair care advice from these boards, *I love you guys* 

The hot stone massage...

I was very nice, my masseuse was very nice and very professional, and the atmosphere of the room was calm, serene and perfect.  However, I still found myself unable to completely relax and let go, I wish I could have.  I wasn't exactly sure what to expect with the "hot stones", exactly how they came into play with the massage.  But it was actually very, very nice.  She first had me undress right down to my gotchies (alone), and then lay down, face up, on her table.  On the table she had placed 6 heated stones with a towel over them, so that when I layed down there would be 3 on either side of my spine from top to bottom.  That atually felt really nice.  She then placed little heated stones in between each of my toes, and one under each of the palms of my hands.  She also then placed a few on my belly, on top of the blanket, I'm not totally sure how many, it felt like maybe four.  She the reason for the stones at that point was to carry the heat all throughout my body....which it did.

She started at my temples, and worked around my face, head and neck.  She then worked her way down my arms, hands & fingers, right down to my legs and toes (skipping the mid section, of course!).  The whole while she used lavender scented massage oil, and alternated using her hands and warm stones to work on my muscles.  She then had me flip over onto my belly so she work on my back and the backs of my legs.  The whole thing lasted an hour.  When she was finished, she left the room so I could get dressed again, and when I came back out into the lobby she treated my to a glass of water and a huge bon-bon.....that's what I'm talking about!  I never got a bon bon after getting my back cracked or my ankles casted.....an awesome finishing touch!  I walked back to my van, sat and enjoyed my rediculously huge bon bon, and then got back to reality.  So all in all it was really nice, it was just my inability to completely let go that held the experience back for me.  So, needless to say, there were no tears.

Thanks for posting your quote, Angel, it makes me feel less alone in the way I'm handling this.  It's exactly as you said, I'm just very confused by the way I'm handling her death, like I know that I've got a million tears stuck inside of me, but I don't know how to make them come out.  I guess they're just not ready yet.  It's really taking a toll on me though, each day I feel more and more run down, miserable, moody and just incapable of handling the simplest of tasks without making mistakes or becoming irate.  Today I've got all that coupled with a blaring head throb, which I have no doubt is stress related and due to lack of restful sleep.  Grief is a crazy thing, and apparently this is how I deal with it. 

Looking on the bright side, the temps are finally rising up into the 40's & 50's again, allowing the bulk of the snow to melt away....again.  I just may go out and chip away at those snow banks for awhile to help them along, being on the shady side of the street means that I'll still have those banks in June while the lucky folks across the street kissed theirs goodbye long ago.  The grass really is green over there.

I'm having a horribly yucky hair day today, it feels like somebody else's hair on my head, I don't know what the heck's going on with it!  Those crazy fly-aways aren't helping things a bit, either.  I'll chalk this one up to stress too, why not?  Maybe it's the volumizing s+c I've been using, perhaps I should switch to something moisturizing instead.  Hmmm, I see a trip to the drug store in the near future...

I'm going to take out some of my frustration on the snow banks now, happy spring all!

Woohoo! Congrats on the new length, Magz! And good luck with the new products. 

I'm still alive.    Just took a little hiatus, that's all.  Needed some time to heal, both physically and spiritually.  All is basically just fine now, hopefully it stays that way for a while.

My wrist is perfectly fine now, took a little while, but it's good as new.  But I have been dealing with a bit of tendonits since then in my right arm.....my "working arm", but I seem to be pulling through that one just as well.

May was a killer month, work-wise, as it is every year.  I've noticed that florists who decide to go out of business usually do it right after the month of may.  They probably think the same thing I do...."I don't know if I can do that again!"   A month straight of 80-90 hour work weeks is plain out yucky.  Proms, Mother's Day, Memorial Day, whew!  I survived it though, I have no idea how, but I did.  Lot's of coffee I think.

Because my schedule was so insane, there was no way that my available hours were going to match up with my hairdresser's hours, so I had to do a little self maintenance with the hair.  Did pretty good, too.  I took an inch off the length, and just trimmed the layers a bit.  Hey, we do what we have to do, right?

So, that put me back to 26.5", and as of a few days ago I was just a smidge under 27", and imo ready for another trim.  This is when things get frustrating, I just can't seem to get ahead!  I am enjoying this length though, but for once in my life I would like to experience my dream of waist length hair.  I'll keep on trying...

Still on Pantene & alternating my product choices nearly daily.  I love options, what can I say?  Also still using Kimberlily's concoction, that stuff's the best.

Outside of that, I'm taking some time to read again.  This time my selection came from my recently passed grandmother's attic, I decided to step outside of my usual comfort zone with reading, I'm being adventurous!  This one's a novel from 1951, I believe, and it's about WWII......totally different for me.  The Caine Mutiny is what it's called.  I'm only about 20 pages in, but I'm really intrigued by it so far.  Plus knowing that it came from my Nana, and that she at some point read it too, gives me some solace.  She's got quite a library, I'll tell ya!

So, that's the scoop.  Have a great day, all!