I have noticed something disturbing to me today. My singing voice appears to have.. gone. died... dissapeared. I don't know if I've simply not been practicing enough, but I need to recover it. For many years(from age 11, roughly, on) My voice has been the one identifying bit that made me, me. Through everything I have been through, everywhere I've seen... Singing kept me pulled together. Learning to put my emotions into song brought me back from the brink of doing something even stupider and more harmful that I did. ... And now it seems it's left me. I was singing along to a CD, one that I could previously sing every song as if it were me on the CD instead (I'm a good mimic, amongst other things)... but today it wasn't even close. I'm.. I'm scared. What if it's gone irrepararably... I dont' think I've done anything that would ruin my voice, but... what if I have? I've been off for a while, and today just brought it home.

All I can hope is that with regular practice, and doing basic exercises again, I'll regain what is rightfully mine. Otherwise I've lost the major part of who I am. 

I certainly did not mean to scare anybody.  If your voice is just rusty (mine certainly is; I haven't done any serious singing in two years) then doing exercises is certainly a good idea.  The impression I got from Kiraela was that her voice had vanished without explanation.  That implied some sort of pathology to me.  In that case, exercises would hurt, not help.  

Nodes will do different things depending on where they are.  They are the equivalent of vocal calluses; small, knobby, whitish growths on the cords.  Folds, I should say, since that is really what they are.  Nodes can result from chronic abuse or a single traumatic event, although typically from the first and not the second.  You will get a breathiness in the tone and your voice just doesn't work properly.  I googled "vocal nodes symptoms" and found some good stuff, including some causes I hadn't remembered (like alcohol) and some I didn't know (hibiscus is a dessicant, so hibiscus tea won't help.)  Some people like their nodes, as they give them a distinctive sound.  

The only REAL way to tell if you have nodes is to go to a laryngologist, who will stick a camera down your throat and ask you to speak or sing.  This test was VERY expensive back in the nineties and I would be surprised if insurance covered it.  

From what you said, La Diosa, it doesn't sound like you have nodes or are doing anything to cause them.  Relax.  

Kiraela, antihistamines are a catch-22.  On the one hand, they prevent the drainage irritating the cords.  On the other, they do this by drying you out.  If you are not experiencing significant symptoms, I wouldn't bother with them.

What part of your range are you losing?  If it's the upper, no problem, you're just out of shape.  If it's on your break (the part of the voice where you shift from chest register to head register, typically B or C1) you might still just be out of shape or you might have a problem.  If it's in the middle of your chest or head registers, then you might have a problem.    If the last one is true, read the rest of this.  If the first one is true, just start practicing and doing your exercises.  If the second one is true, I can't say which it might be without hearing you.  Maybe you can find a good vocal teacher and see what they think.  Since the doctor is out of the question (Understand that one, believe me!) then here is what I recommend.

First of all, you are absolutely right, pushing is BAD!  What is happening is that the folds don't want to come together, and you are forcing them to do so through the increase in volume.  Second, living with the smokers certainly doesn't help, but I don't think it caused your problem.  It just might be interfering with the resolution.  

Do you have acid reflux?  I went to the doctor about my voice about three years ago and she said that I have acid reflux at night, which was preventing my folds from healing from an episode of abuse.  Treating the acid reflux will help the voice heal.

Can you think of an incident of yelling, at a sports event or maybe when you dropped a can on your toe?  A huge fight you had with someone, or a time you got really excited or scared?  The reason I am asking is because you want to avoid that behavior in the future, if possible.  (Yes, when you drop the can on your toe, from now on you will calmly say, "Oh dear" rather than yelling "*%&#!")      

Some conditions, such as polyps, can mimic nodes.  They are all resolved with rest.  So rest your voice as much as you can.  I would say no singing of any kind for at least a month.

Now I understand that is like asking you to temporarily remove your toes, but if you have a problem it is necessary.  Just tell yourself that you've got forty more years of your life (in my case; you've probably got more) and this is one month of not singing out of the next forty years.

Now of course, you probably have just a temporary condition due to allergies or something else.  Since I am not a doctor and haven't seen you, I can't say.  And I certainly don't mean to scare you.  But I know that resting your voice can't hurt you, and that not resting it can.  So rest it, drink water, treat your acid reflux if you have it, and try singing again in a month.

 
 

I still think we are talking a mild laryngitis.  "Itis" just means inflammation, and I think part of your vocal folds are inflammed.  Probably due to allergies, since you mentioned you have recently moved and noticed your nose is stuffier than usual.  It isn't severe, so you don't notice a difference with your speaking voice or even all of your singing voice.  I have had episodes of laryngitis where I lost only my middle range, but not the upper or lower.

I still would recommend drinking lots of water, both to flush the allergens and hydrate the voice, and I would take the singing VERY SLOWLY.  Do not push, do not strain.  I would work on sustaining exercises rather than range exercises.  For example, ah-eh-ee-oh-oo-mah-meh-mee-moh-moo-lah-leh-lee-loh-loo all sung on one pitch and in one breath.  Start at least a fifth below your trouble spots and ease in to them.  At the first sign of trouble, stop.

And really, I still would not sing AT ALL for at least one week, all the while drinking that water!  Let me know what happens.

Oh that's right, you don't like water.  Hmmm.  Non-hibiscus, non-caffeinated tea okay?   

Let me know what you think of the Deep K.  Sorry, just too tired to say anything more.

JD

youch.  All I know is, I hate it when anyone references my brother in describing me... I just hope that people realize I'm not ANYTHING like him. My parents even seem to forget that at times... hmm, steve's calling asking for money again, probably K. will need some too. I hate that they think I need money from them... but then again, on the other hand I get free money. 

On another note, i wish I were on whatever army base it is in CO right now... *wants to smack her brother with a rolling pin* less than two weeks after getting married, he was caught cheating on my sister in law(the mother of his two children) when he dissapeared during a party he was throwing AT HIS OWN HOUSE. Sorry for the rant, I'm just a little... peeved... with him right now.

Didn't get a ride to the post office today, so no DEEP conditioner. Tomorrow we're going to New Orleans to pick up some parts... I'll see if I can get Paul to take me by the PO. on the way home. Fun thing is.... the starter in our truck has been... hit or miss... since it was installed 5 mo ago. The past few days it's been having to be push started any time it moves. It's going to be fun in the city tomorrow............

My mother gets that feeling in the French Quarter.  I, on the other hand, do not, and did not understand what she meant until I went to Vienna.  Then it was as if something deep in my soul said, "Yes.  This is home."

I have always wondered if it was because I had been staying in the Austrian mountains, which bothered me a lot.  I am not from the mountainous part of Texas, and the lack of horizons coupled with the tall buildings and narrow streets in Graz made me feel claustrophobic.  Vienna is in a flatter part of Austria and the streets are wider.  So I have always wanted to go back and see if Vienna spoke to me like it did before. 

I had a similar feeling when I went to Saudi Arabia.  Not "this is home" but "you are meant to be right here, right now."  Those feelings are weird when you get them.  But kind of cool, too.