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joeydog 1992

Ex Member

Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick
Reply #90 - Jul 10^th, 2007 at 6:21am

Sigh. Long day ahead today and I am not into it at all. I thought I had everything under control so that I would be home around 3, but that isn't going to happen now.

I have to go to the hospital from 9-11 this morning. That promises to be painful. I will have to leave here at 7 to make it. It is a 1 hour drive when it is not rush hour, but I can't get into worse rush hour traffic. I had thought my appointments started at 10 so I had planned on going in to work before the hospital, but that wont work now with the time of my appt. When I am at work under normal circumstances, I start at 7, but today I need IT to come and set up my computer for me and they do not get in until 8 so going in before 8 would just be a waste of my time. Clearly, I cannot contact them, get them to my desk and have them done by 8:30 when I would have to leave for the hospital!! No point in going in for 8 the way my hospital appointments are.

I am being taken out for lunch right after my hospital appointments. I wish I could say that is a good thing, but it isn't really. My friends have good intentions and are taking me out in celebration of my birthday which is kind, but there are 2 problems. The first is that one of the people that is coming I can't stand. He is always trying to touch me and act like we are dating or something. He turns my stomach. On the bright side, I am hoping to cut all ties with him after today.

The second problem is that I am feeling some what agoraphobic and and socialphobic and of course they have chosen a buffet just to add to my problems. A quiet table would have been easier on me as opposed to having to get up and go through a line with strangers.

I probably wont get to work until 2. I had liked the 8 am thing. Less people to run into. When you have been away from work a while and come back, everyone wants to be nice and say hi. Like I said, not up for that really. Plus, having just realized that I wont get to work until around 2, I just figured out I will be lucky to be home by 5. Chances are IT will take upwards of 45 minutes to show up, then about 30 minutes to get the computer up and running and then I will have to do some quick paper work on the computer so that I get a pay check when I get back. I probably wont get out of there until 4...and once again be trapped in rush hour. Ugh. This is why I work 7-3, so I can avoid rush hour.

I had wanted to cut my lawn and edge my flower beds today. It is not likely as things stand...not enough hours in the day and of course it is darned well raining out there.

Sigh, I am not doing well with the determination to get the rest of my life together here. Hopefully once I get out there it will not be as bad as I am thinking it will be. I guess the best why to find out is to get on with it. Ya know, a year ago I loved going to work. I hope that feeling comes back soon.

JD

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Curlgirl64 Stardust Offline Practice Yoga,give and receive Reiki Posts: 2974 Brooklyn,N.Y. Gender:	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #91 - Jul 10^th, 2007 at 6:29am It'll be ok. Just breathe and try to relax. Sometimes just deep breathing will help ya out. Tonight you can look back and say you made it through. Keep your eye on the "end of the tunnel",you'll do just fine! I know you will!!
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roomtogrow Emerald Offline Posts: 379 Gender:	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #92 - Jul 10^th, 2007 at 1:13pm yeah j-dog you'll get through it. also at work, wear a head set even if you aren't listening to anything-maybe folks will think you are busy. best of luck
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joeydog 1992

Ex Member

Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick
Reply #93 - Jul 10^th, 2007 at 6:09pm

Thank you ladies for your support. RTG, you make me laugh. I am so grateful you write the things you do. Today went worse than I anticipated....bs for the most part...but today I want to 'rant' about something else.

"Pride cometh before the fall". I wrote that to a member about a month ago because I was concerned that they were not asking for help when they might need it. I have noticed that the member has not made a comment on my journal (which the used to) and that the member has not discussed thing relating to the topic I said that about. I was not trying to tell them that they were to full of pride, but to think about it...Now, I still stand by what I said, but just to show I am not a hypocrit (sp?) I want to talk about me doing the pride before the fall.

Sorry, I have to do a bit of history here...and I will really try to be short...but I have some doubts...

As you all know, my hubby and I are split...why...well, when my disease started up again (I don not have cancer but I go in out of remission like cancer) and the pain was unbareable, he ran up the bills, did nothing (and I mean NOTHING around the house and said I was to much of a ... well it rhymes with witch) to deal with. Ya, I could be a witch...but the pain was terrible and I was trying to work (and I was out an hour longer than him every day), pay off his bills (did I mention he had 2 bankruptcies (sp)) and run the house alone. Not pretty. Anyway, he ran home to Mommy (yes he is 49 and has lived there most of his life). Now that I am getting better again, he wants back.

Now, I am not letting him back. My disease will come back and if he cannot be there for me unless I am the "Rock" then I cannot deal with it. There is no future in that. What if I did get cancer, or need a heart surgery or something...would he run home to mom until I was well.

So, 2 days ago I told him to come and get the rest of his stuff on Sunday and be on his way. (Thankfully the house, my car, and everything I own and he has no claims on it as I covered myself before we married and was actually able to claim that he was a tenant due to his bankruptcies. All I had to prove was that my finincial obligations had not been covered by his ... corruption of creditors, which I kept all my reciepts for and could prove).

Now, as I mentioned, I had said he was...lazy. Since I bought this house almost 3 years ago, I have had certain jobs for him which I felt were 'man' jobs...things like drywalling the garage, wiring electricity into my crawl space and stuff like that.

Well, he never did it and I have done most of those jobs myself over the past 2 months...but here comes the point, having got the history out of the way...

Tonight I found myself walking around the house figuring out the few jobs I had not done (all of which would take me about 2 full days). I suddenly got it in my head that I could have that done before he comes to get his stuff on Sunday.

Now, if you have been following my journal... you know I am going back to work for the first time in 8 months (due to illness) on Monday. I need to rest...but because of pride, I thought about busting my....behind instead of resting. Wrong answer, JD!!! The hospital is concerned about me working 8 hours a day 3 days a week as it is...I do not need to wear myself down before then.

"Pride cometh before the fall". JD does not need help with these things...but JD will put herself back if she follows her pride to show someone she is ok alone. Tonight I remind myself that my pride could hurt me too.

Pride has many forms...today that was my form...and today I accept that my pride was going to get the best of me...and I am withdrawing. We ALL ( I don't not care who you are) let pride govern us at times. Today I am pleased to say...I know my pride was getting out of hand...and I stand down.

To the member I wanted to have this read...pls, start talking about the things you used to talk about...I was not judging you and I do not believe anyone here does either...we all have our moments...This was mine.

JD

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Angel Spun

Ex Member

Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick
Reply #94 - Jul 11^th, 2007 at 4:07pm

Aww, JD.

All I can say is you go, girl!

Sorry that your ex was such a Lips Sealed

and didn't stick with you when you needed him most. I'm not sure if you follow the bible, but there's a passage in there that says love believes, hopes and endures all things. A guy who bails out on you at the first sign of trouble is not the right one. Believe me, I have been there!

If you can do what needs to be done around the house on your own, then you're better off. Otherwise, I would suggest hiring out rather than relying on your ex to take care of things. He's already proven that he can't be depended upon.
Some guys are just totally spineless and can't manage anything on their own. I'm sorry that someone like that ever believed that he deserved to marry you. Try not to fault yourself too much for giving him a chance. He's the one who blew it.

In any case, you're an independent woman who doesn't need the assistance of someone like him. But it's also good that you know your limitations and don't let yourself get overburdened. Trying to take on more than you can in a day only leads to disappointment. Trust me, I have some experience there as well.

I hope that things clear up for you soon, JD. Just remember that life is a continuous stream of phases, none of which are permanent. Remind yourself that "this, too, shall pass" and clear skies are ahead. Hang in there, dearie. *hugz*

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Kiraela

Diamond

Offline

Posts: 825
Southern Louisiana
Gender: female

Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick
Reply #95 - Jul 11^th, 2007 at 5:01pm

I have to agree with Angel... If he cut and ran when you were ill, and now wants back... well.. he reminds me of a fish I had named Bofess (short for Bottom feeding scum sucker Tongue

)

And even if one is not religious.. that passage still should be the guide to life and love! If you can't find a romantic partner that will be there for you through all things... good AND bad... at least know you have friends who love you and will support you. Grin

*hug* I'm glad you realized what a lousy chit he was.

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“It’s easy to love somebody before you really know them. The trick is to keep loving them once you do.” ~ Mackenzie Blaise, --> TalesOfMU.com&&

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joeydog 1992 Ex Member	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #96 - Jul 11^th, 2007 at 6:12pm Thanx for the support ladies. Life goes on...and so will I!!
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Lisabelle Stardust Offline Kami wa onna no inochi - A womens hair is her life Posts: 2797 Southern Ontario, Canada Gender:	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #97 - Jul 11^th, 2007 at 8:59pm Some guys.... Thank god your done with him! (((hugs)))
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roomtogrow

Emerald

Offline

Posts: 379
Gender: female

Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick
Reply #98 - Jul 12^th, 2007 at 3:35pm

yeah jd, i think k has aptly named him bomess or whatever the bottom feeder term was. don't overdo it with all the new projects, as you don't want to overwork yourself and make your health decline. man, i'm still impressed with all the garage work you did! Shocked

as for the whole pride info, that's totally true. i've been learning that recently as well-job searching for me is a complicated balance of finding peace instead of pride and alternately insecurity!

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joeydog 1992

Ex Member

Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick
Reply #99 - Jul 12^th, 2007 at 4:32pm

LOL, I have visions of me calling him Bofess when he is here getting his stuff on the weekend.

I spent some time last night making up one of Curly64's deep conditioning mix and infusing EVOO so that I don't have to worry about such things when I first go to work. One of my friends who is a gourmet chef called while I was making up my mixes. He laughed and told me I was like a witch brewing potions. It made me laugh.

As I have mentioned before, I love Holly Maire Combs. I watch Charmed religiously actually. I know, I am probably a bit old for it, but I relate with the character of Piper. Her obsession with cleaning, family and always striving for a normal life are things I get. Ok, so I am not a witch...but I feel like I am always struggling for a normal life because of my illness...which is my personal demon to be vanquished!! So, being compared to a witch made me laugh.

Anyway...I used the Curly64 'potion' today and my hair is great now. It is nice and soft and shiny. Thanx Curly. I still have 3 batches left for once I am at work and maybe I will make more tonight to freeze.

I ordered 5 shampoo bars from Ida of Chagrin and they arrived earlier this week. Ida was really sweet and put a couple of sample bars in the package for me. I usually use the Mud and Clay, and sometimes the Neem, both of which I love. I tried the sample of Rosemary and Mint today. As is the case with the other bars, it is great. I love it...but I still feel the Mud and Clay is the best for my hair. I can't remember what the other sample is...but I will tell you about it when I try it.

RTG, I am flattered that you feel that was a good project for me to have done (garage). Hopefully in about 2 years I will be posting things about how finishing the basement is driving me nuts. Oh will I be glad once that is done. I think next year I will be building a shed...if I can find the money. Just because I don't have a man here, it doesn't mean I wont get things done as they were planned when he was here!

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Angel Spun

Ex Member

Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick
Reply #100 - Jul 12^th, 2007 at 4:52pm

Quote:

Just because I don't have a man here, it doesn't mean I wont get things done as they were planned when he was here!

Amen, sister! That's the right attitude.
One of my most popular quips right after my divorce was, "I don't need no man's help, shoot." Grin

That self-reliance will always be with me, and I'm grateful for it.

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Kiraela Diamond Offline Posts: 825 Southern Louisiana Gender:	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #101 - Jul 13^th, 2007 at 1:58am To ge the full effect, the proper pronunciation of Bofess is something like "boo-fuss"... so that it rhymes with dufus
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joeydog 1992 Ex Member	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #102 - Jul 13^th, 2007 at 9:49am ROFL....boo-rus it is!!! Thanx K. JD
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Curlgirl64 Stardust Offline Practice Yoga,give and receive Reiki Posts: 2974 Brooklyn,N.Y. Gender:	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #103 - Jul 13^th, 2007 at 10:30am You're welcome,JD! Glad you like the conditioner recipe! For a hair refresher when you need it,try Prairieland shampoo bars,they have great lather!!!!
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joeydog 1992 Ex Member	Re: Joeydog's trials to grow hair when sick Reply #104 - Jul 13^th, 2007 at 10:35am Cool, I am going to google those bars right now!! JD
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